(First published in 2002)
Before I weigh in on my topic, I would just like to take a moment to set the record straight for Mistrix Julia Roberts. When she said that she looked in the dictionary and found Republicans between the words REPTILE and REPULSIVE, I was, as were so many conservatives, indignant. After all, my kids have lizards, and they can hardly be likened to Republicans. They don't have a particular odor, and they just sort of sit there, doing nothing at all. In fact, they are more like Democrats, in that they like to bask in the bright light, but tend to hide under rocks when it comes to doing the vile, reptilian, repulsive things that lizards sometimes do when they don't want to bask. I think Mistrix Roberts would have better luck finding Republicans between QUISLING and SPINELESS. If not in the dictionary, then in Congress.
Well, it seems that the feminists are up to more shenanigans again. This time, however, they've taken their knives to the Very Word of God and castrated the Holy Bible. Not that they would ever read it, themselves. They are more interested in making everyone else feel guilty, and the Bible points out clearly that everyone's guilty.
I realize that lately, everyone has had something to say about the Scriptures. We are living in the age of a paper doll Jesus. He manages to emerge as the guru for every conceivable cause du jour. Whether Jesus is the Post-Modern intellectual's vegetarian homosexual who married Mary Magdalene, had kids and "swooned" on the cross, but then got all better, thanks to the dampness of the tomb reviving him, or the Incarnate Son of God who died for the sins of the world and rose again the 3rd day for fools like myself, Jesus and his Father are now fully emasculated, thanks to the brain trust of psychobabblers who call themselves linguists. This in the name of "inclusiveness". Feminists should explain what they mean by inclusiveness, when they have banned all the boys from this version of the Bible.
I am not sure what to do about this particular onslaught of bad and impotent English, since this cult has permeated its mindset into every aspect of our lives. Feminists seem to be immune to ridicule, though. I had hoped that their doom was sealed when they made their "see no hypocrisy" pact with Bill Clinton. Maybe this latest attack is just a dying gasp. I wish.
My King James Bible looks so inviting these days. And even more comforting since September 11th. Are not the two most powerful words in English "Jesus wept"? Anyone who has read the Psalms or Ecclesiastes in the King James Version must come away with a sense of awe at the power and depth of beauty that is the language of the King James Bible. I hope that there will be a surge in sales of the King James Bible. For all of its flaws, it proves one thing well: Feminists are irrelevant. And Mrx Julia Roberts can find that word in the dictionary between the words IMBECILE and KOOK.