Saturday, July 15, 2006

So Many things to say, so little time to say them

It is time to take sides.

It is time to realize that we are truly in a world war.

Some are calling it World War III, yet others are calling it World War IV.

Doesn't matter.

What history will record is whether Western Civilization survives and Islam be utterly defeated, or is it just a given that Islam will succeed because we lack the desire to survive?

I don't know whether or not we have the will to win this war.

It is so discouraging to listen to the navel gazing press interview each other about this celebrity or that celebrity.

And their frickin' babies.

Shut UP! Get serious!

It is even more discouraging to listen to our President and State Department tell a righteously aggrieved ally to "show restraint".

In other words, don't respond.

Enough is enough, already!

It is time to fight back, and it is time to stand with the righteous.

This is a war between utter evil and good.

Choose whom you will this day serve.

As for me and my household we will serve the Lord.

We will support Israel. We will stand with her, pray with her, fast with her, support her in whatever way we must, but this isn't only an Israeli conflict.

Israel is only the "Littlest Satan".

We are the bigger fish they so badly want to fry.

If Israel can be tempted into signing yet another worthless peace treaty, she can be destroyed, one inch at a time.

Any of you taking the side of the State of Vampiria, please note: Your head is next on the chopping block, so consider not being useful idiots for a change and recognize that the world is finally at war.

Pick a side, and if you choose the losing side, don't come running to my house....

I ain't hiding your yellow ass in my attic.

Item number Two:

To those people in my family who have a problem with me talking about my past, put your trembling hearts at rest. I am not scandalmongering, and I am not showing disrespect to my mother. If anything, I have tried to treat Mom's life with sympathy.

I write from my memories of her as a child, with a child's puzzlement about mental illness. I am going to continue to explore this topic, from my memories, and my perspectives.

I am not blogging to humiliate, shame or scandalize anyone. I love my family. I am writing vignettes about my life. That is why it isn't in chronological order. These are just stories about my experiences. I am not writing about your experiences, m'kay?

Finally, these stories all have a common thread. It is this: You need a good sense of humor to get through life. If you look at the billion seething muslims in the world, the one characteristic they display is a galling lack of a humor gland. Which is why they are so damned funny. Not.

Now, if you don't like what you read here, post a comment! That's why the comments section is there. And please, don't go complaining to other family members. They have read this blog and don't have a problem with it. It is in poor taste to not come forth and share your problem with me.

Last Item of the day:

I hope you find this as useful as I did. Implementing these rules will make your writing fresh and crunchy and oh so finger licking yummy!

How to write good

1. Avoid alliteration. Always.

2. Prepositions are not words to end sentences with.

3. Avoid cliches like the plague. (They're old hat.)

4. Employ the vernacular.

5. Eschew ampersands & abbreviations, etc.

6. Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are unnecessary.

7. It is wrong to ever split an infinitive.

8. Contractions aren't necessary.

9. Foreign words and phrases are not apropos.

10. One should never generalize.

11. Eliminate quotations. As Ralph Waldo Emerson said, "I hate quotations. Tell me what you know."

12. Comparisons are as bad as cliches.

13. Don't be redundant; don't use more words than necessary; it's highly superfluous.

14. Be more or less specific.

15. Understatement is always best.

16. One-word sentences? Eliminate.

17. Analogies in writing are like feathers on a snake.

18. The passive voice is to be avoided.

19. Go around the barn at high noon to avoid colloquialisms.

20. E ven if a mixed metaphor sings, it should be derailed.

21. Who needs rhetorical questions?

22. Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement.

There, I think that just about covers everything I wanted to say today!

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