Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Wednesday Night Haramfest for April 23, 2008

Tonight was spare ribs with macaroni and cheese. It took me a long time to learn how to cook the pork properly, but here is what works for me: First of all, trim the skirt away from the main rack, and loosen up all the silver skin around the bones in back. It is inedible, anyway, and doesn't add anything to the cooking process. Removing it will mean melt off the bone succulence, and easy slicing. Next, I use a dry rub. Adolphe's and a host of other experts make tasty dry rubs, but if you wanted to, you can make one by mixing unmeasured amounts of the following ingredients, with the largest amounts listed first: light brown sugar, garlic powder, onion powder, salt, pepper, cayenne pepper, cumin, dried thyme, cinnamon. This is a really sweet and savory rub, with a good kick in it as well. I don't really measure any of the ingredients, but it works out well with just your taste buds.
Rub the rack front and back, place in a foil lined broiler sheet, cover with a cookie sheet, and cook for 2 hours at 250 degrees. Yes, I know that some of you boil your ribs, but I don't and the slow cooking process works marvels on the meat. After you've slow cooked it, you can grill the rack out on the grill over a low flame, and then if you want, add your barbecue sauce. You don't want to turn the glaze into black tar, so be careful and watch what you're doing.

Next up, is the macaroni and cheese. I know this will sound blasphemous, but the best boxed mac and cheese is made by Sam's and sold in red boxes for 50 cents apiece at Walmart. It's called Sam's Extra creamy Macaroni and Cheese, and it really is much better than Kraft's but I make it over the top fantastic by substituting milk with light cream, and adding some sharp shredded cheddar at the end of cooking it. Mix the cheese powder, butter and cream over a low burner while the macaroni drains. Whisking or stirring with a wooden spoon makes it creamy. Just before adding the mac to the cheese, add the cheddar. Doing these two small things makes a big difference from mere boxed mac 'n' cheese to something darned near gourmet!

Green Beans are best when barely boiled. They should be slightly crisp. It is possible to get good steamed green beans from the frozen food section. I like Hanover's baby whole green beans. Something about eating the young and tender that makes my blackened heart merry! I hate green bean casserole, so I don't even make it. I keep it simple. I used to crisp up some bacon and drizzle the drippings over the beans, and toss them with diced tomatoes and bacon, and I still do, occasionally, but my family's favorite is steamed green beans, tossed with toasted sesame oil, kosher salt and toasted sesame seeds. The great thing about preparing the beans this way, is that they are just as good cold as they are hot! Give them a try, and tell me what you think.

And now, a final moment of tasty haram goodness: Eva Cassidy singing Somewhere Over The Rainbow....


  1. Mmmm.

    Over at my place you invited me and my BFF Jack Bauer to dinner. Be careful what you ask for: neither of our wives cooks. Mine is old and disabled, and Jack's is young and gorgeous (so he doesn't care she can't cook). Eating together (take out and buffets, mostly) is how we bond, since we're twenty-five years apart in age.

    This stuff looks so good, especially the bbq in defiance of Allah. Alas, we're almost 2000 miles away from you, but for food there's no telling what we might do.

    Your hubby must be fat as a pig. I certainly hope HE appreciates you.


  2. I am so sorry that you must only eat vicariously at my place! As for the hubster, you'd think 25 years of good cooking would be his downfall, but he is still 156 lbs, and just slightly balder....with a dashing touch of gray along the sides of his head! And he does appreciate me, too. On Thursdays and Sundays!

  3. Haramfest :) Beautiful haha. I just checked your blog by luck from the comments on Dhimmiwatch. It's hilarious. All the best!

  4. Thanks, Ito. I meet a lot of good commenters at DW and JW, and it is cathartic to say what you really think, when all else around you seem to padlock their own mouths and pens. Feel free to comment on anything anytime!

  5. seanymph1:02 AM

    I swear we are twins...........this is a regular meal made at my house too! My bf just loves my ribs(pork ones not mine per se altho......nevermind Ill keep it PG hehee) and he loved that crapinabox Kraft mac and cheese so I doctor that up too. I call it paste in a box cuz real mac and cheese wouldnt look like that when it got cold! giggle.


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