Thursday, May 29, 2008
Eat Not The Cookie of Satan! Read the whole thing! Follow its wisdom, for Lo! It is Truth!
Eat instead the Cake of the Devil!
Yes, keeds, it is time for a story involving what else: FOOD. I will, in no way try to compete with Gerard Vanderleun's prose, which involves a fantastic recipe for his mom's chocolate chip cookies, and what constitutes the important thing on everyone's mind, these days, but I will tell you a really charming story involving babies...really cute little babies.
These babies. Twenty years ago....sigh. They are our first. Hard to believe they are in college, now.
On the left, Emily, the first born, kicked out of the womb by her bigger little sister on the right, Julia. We nicknamed them various things, starting with the hospital names: Baby A and Baby B. Since there were at least three other sets of twins in the NICU, Baby A and Baby B was a little too confusing. So we called them Trial (Emily) and Error (Julia)...which later became Mei Mei and Shu Shu...and we still call them those nicks! One older gentleman used to call them Icky-Pee and Icky-Poo, depending what happened when he held them...Icky Oh $h!t I am Covered with Vomit, and Now My Shirt is Ruined! being the alternate.
At some point, these things begin to walk and talk and get themselves into all kinds of trouble. Occasional visits from the Social Services Ladies being a sometime rare thing, but only when Trial would wander off, while Error was still in her crib sleeping, and vice versa. Thank Goodness our neighbors weren't cannibals or pederasts. It is those precious, precious times we mothers of twins rue not getting a set of conjoined twins, instead.
One such time was the Tuesday Before the Wednesday Morning Ladies Bible Study, where we all sit around in a circle and eat decadent treats involving Betty Crocker and Duncan Hines and Rice Krispies, Jell-O, Shoo fly Pie, or Pillsbury...and talk about stuff in the Bible sometimes.
It was my turn to make some sinfully distracting comestible and I chose to make Very Dark and Evil Chewy Triple Fudge Brownies. Two batches. With Chocolate Frosting. Enough for each of us ladies to enjoy one without incurring to much of the Wrath of our Hips.
Spending the better part of the morning making brownies, and doing laundry while keeping the babies amused wears a mommy out, and mommy and babies retired to our room to nap til lunch. Which, I did, but the babies had other plans. They climbed out of their cribs, slid down the stairs and toddled into the kitchen, where they climbed up onto the chair, and then onto the breakfast table, where they began to indulge themselves silly in Ladies' Bible Study Food!
WELL! My Mother's Spidey sense aroused me shortly thereafter, and I tiptoed down to the kitchen, only to find Trial and Error sitting, clad only in their diapers, on the kitchen table, four fist fulls of brownies.
Two pairs of baby blue eyes met the holy rage brewing in my face, and startled, Error dropped her ill gotten goody and covered her face in shame with guilty chocolate covered hands, while her sister, Trial...her chocolate frosted face bathed in guiltless joy, contented and sated in a way that only chocolate can, beamed, and through her chocolate crusted tooth, said, "Mmmmm.....Cake.......I....like......Cake."